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There are times when writing is easy and there are times when writing is hard. These will change for every person but for today, I want to let you know some of the things that make writing hard for me. The first is summer. I don’t know what it is, but summer is the hardest time for me to write. It seems to be a lot more work in summer than it is in winter. It must be a combination of the heat, the humidity and the fact that I am much more slothful when I’m warm and happy.
Second is writing block. This only happens (as I’m coming to understand) when something is inherently broken in the scene I’m writing or where the story is going. My mind defines this as “It’s Wrong; Fix It” and refuses to budge from that positions until I figure out exactly what is wrong with the book. Fortunately, as I learn more about myself, I find that bouts of writer’s block don’t last as long as they used to.
Third is Too Many Projects. I can handle having quite a few projects on my plate and everyone I know says that I am a bit of whiz for multi-tasking. Unfortunately, all that skill seems to go out the window if I have four or more projects on the go. For instance, my current writing list is comprised of 1)Music Review(finished just an hour before I started writing this), 2)Blog Post(if you’re reading this, I am finished it now), 3)Falling through the Threshold(I’m in the last few chapters, maybe 16k to typing the coveted “The End”, 4)Dual Melodies(I’ve gotten behind on my 2YN stuff for it) and 5)A short story for SiWC(Got the idea, but haven’t done any planning or writing beyond that point). I was fine when it was just the three stories, but trying to add the other two flummoxed me. Fortunately, they will be things of the past by the time you’re reading this.
Forth is Video Games. I don’t think I need too much insight into this one. 
Fifth is the Real World. Sometimes it sucks. Sometimes you’re having hard times with your spouse. Sometimes as a writer you hit a wall and want to rail against it, angry and hurt, but you can’t because it’s not a problem that can be solved by screaming. Sometimes problems from the real world leave you feeling empty and drained inside.
All these things can happen and some of them sneak up on us so quickly or so silently that you won’t even see them coming. But those are the times when you have to remind yourself that these moments are exactly what your writing is for. It’s to remind you that everything is precious, that everything is worthy of being recorded and that sometimes you don’t have to live through pain to understand how to help with it. Why do I write, even when it’s hard? So that I know, I’ll be remembered, exactly as I am now, crystallized in a particular emotion, even if I’m called by something else right then.
As I final thought, I’ll leave you a favourite quote of mine by F.Scott Fizgerald. He once said “Writers aren’t people exactly. Or, if they’re any good, they’re a whole lot of people trying so hard to be one person. It’s like actors, who try so pathetically not to look in mirrors. Who lean backward trying – only to see their faces in the reflecting chandeliers.”
Posted in Blogs on July 2nd, 2011 by B.A. Matthews | | Comments Off
Please feel free to comment about the music, my review or even just about the band here!
Posted in Musing About the Words... on December 8th, 2010 by B.A. Matthews | | Comments Off
Today is one of those days when I wouldn’t mind using #FML as a hashtag on Twitter. Not that its even been that bad of a day. All in all, it’s been a good day actually. I finished Nanowrimo with 56,331 words, an awesome total. In addition, I came in twelveth overall in the city for those that hang out on the Nanowrimo forums, and probably the top 20 of writers in Calgary if we count those who don’t. I had a friend visit today, last night was a TGIO party… all in all, it’s been excellent. The main problem stems from me. I have made a deal with my body; If it works harder for me in November, I’ll let it rest in December. So I still feel like I’m running on fumes, 7 days later… though it is getting better.
As if to make it worse, I’ve also been hit by a light bout of insomnia. It means that if I don’t head to sleep the moment I feel tired, I wake back up immediately. Normally this would be counted as extra writing time, but in December, it starts weighing on me, since I actually need to work. On the other hand, at least insomnia never lasts more than three to five days for me so I do know that simply waiting it out is a viable plan.
I do have more vacation coming up at the end of the month (Yes more… I take all my vacation late in the year) which will give me some good time to catch up on all the writing I’m not doing right now. This is why I’m not feeling too guilty about taking 15 – 20 days off to recover from the work of Nanowrimo. And what was that? Writing?
Yes, I have completely stopped writing… I need to get myself back into it, and this blog is a vital step towards that. I find that one of the hardest parts of Nano is to start writing again after December rolls around. However, I am going to make some promises to you guys.
1. I will be writing this year, and much more this month than in November.
2. I will have my novel rough draft finished for the end of February.
3. My music reviews will hence forth be finished within two weeks of receiving them.
4. This novel will be edited and I will start sending it out to publishers before the end of next year. In fact, if I’m lucky, I’ll have it done pre-SiWC 2011.
As for my story? Well, it’s actually been a roaring success this year. I am working on Chapter 14, of a probable 30 Chapter book, so I’m almost half way there. I have a complete story so far. Not much in the way of subplots… more a mention of such here and there. My story has thus far been written in order and the chapters are coming out mostly of a reasonable length (about 4K worth of words). The plot is making sense, I have good explanations for my world building that is fitting in. The only thing I’m somewhat disappointed in is that thus far, I’ve alluded to the war that the vampires are in but I haven’t actually come out and said it. This will need to rectified and will probably include me writing in a new character, a commander in the war on the side of the vampires.
I feel that my writing is definitely improving this year and with every book I write, it gets easier and easier to put together a cohesive story that works.
On a non-nanowrimo front, I have finished reading the High King of Montival now and while I can say that it is one of the best books I’ve ever read, I am quite annoyed with SM Stirling. This was originally going to be the end of the series… apparently now there are another two books coming out. While I love reading more of his books, which makes this somewhat a good thing, it is also a bit of an annoyance, since I was thought I was going to read the incredible and satisfying conclusion. Ah well, I can’t be really annoyed… it was too good a book for me to be actually annoyed! For those of you who asked, I have now started reading Geist and its almost as good as High King of Montival. I’ll review it as soon as I’m finished it and have just a bit of time.
In closing, How was nano for you? Did you get anything written? What have you learned about your noveling over the last nano? What books are you reading and what books do you think I need to review for you?
Posted in Blogs on December 6th, 2010 by B.A. Matthews | | 2 Comments »
Please I’d love to listen to your thoughts on “Poetry of Wonder”. Which songs did you enjoy? Did you agree with my assessment on the album? Post below and let me know!
If you came to this page first, please follow the link to read the review first!
I was sitting down at my office today when it occurred to me, that I look at artistic mediums differently now than I did even 2 years ago. Compared with my younger self I find that I critique things now, instead of simply enjoying it the medium. A good example of this is how I now think about movies. I have found myself, more and more as time goes on, criticizing story, plot and setting than I used to. A very good difference though is that I tend to do it in a very constructive way. A few years ago if I watched a movie that I didn’t enjoy I would say “Oh, I didn’t like that movie”, but when I was asked why, I couldn’t give the reasons. Or I could give individual points that I didn’t like, but I was unable to describe why the whole didn’t work for me. Now, I’m able to look at movies, whether like or dislike, and explain what didn’t work for me and what did. I also find it exceptionally interesting that I tend to talk about the differences using an author’s terms, not in the terms a movie or screenplay would use.
The first movie that I can remember doing this to was 9. You may or may not remember this Disney movie from a few years ago. It was an interesting computer animated film about a dystopia in which humanity has been destroyed. The only living things are 9 small creatures designed to look like men (at least in basic shape) and their enemies, the robots that destroyed the world. The basic premise of the 9 creatures was that a brilliant scientist created them before he died, animating each of them with a personality or aspect of the man’s soul. In the movie, the creatures not only have to figure out who made them and why they are here, but they also have to defeat the evil robots who seem to be carrying out their last programmed command of “If it moves, kill it.”
My final decision on the movie was that it was good overall but while I enjoyed it, it could have been much better. One of the arguments I gave for this was that “the movie didn’t keep its promises.” This frustrated the heck out of my husband who didn’t understand the term. I explained it to him by saying that the ending seemed to have been afraid to fulfill its promise of a gritty, philosophical ending. They had copped out instead by making everybody left alive sad about their friends’ death, but moving on, in a sappy scene where we see the earth healing itself. It didn’t seem to fit the movie, as though they’d cheapened it by taking the easy way out.
I do the same with music, which is actually where I first noticed me doing it. When I first started doing my music reviews, I had a few albums that were types I honestly didn’t enjoy much. I initially put off doing the reviews as long as I could. Eventually I realized that a good music review isn’t based on whether or not I ‘like’ the album in question, but whether or not it had been done well, noting where it was lacking and why and why the albums did excellently and why. It really taught me a lot when I began to look critically at all of the music.
Now I’m pleased to be able to say that I think I’m finally figuring out how to apply that critical thinking to my writing. I think this is a huge step for me in my learning curve. Now I just need to figure out how to connect it to the books I read. I think that I may have been doing so unconsciously since I’ve been having trouble reading anything. I seem to be catching the writers doing something that irritates me I’ll immediately put the book down and think about how to not make that same mistake in my own writing (or how I would improve it in that book).
On a related note, I started reading a favourite older book today, Sebastian by Anne Bishop. Set in the world of Ephemera, the book details how the Eater of the World is escaping his bounds. The best thing about the book (which is brilliant to begin with) is the way that the story really makes you think about the way their world works, and how we re-create our world with the truths within our hearts. It always makes me look back on my own life and try to untangle the strands that hold my heart and soul captive, trying to understand which of my life’s biggest issues have been brought about by someone else and which have been brought about by me.
It’s very interesting if only because searching the interconnected webs teaches me how people are tied together by their relationships and how sometimes the simplest of things can change our perception.
I think I’m going to start something new this week as well. I’m going to try writing up a 1k – 5k story on the writing prompts on the Writing Excuses podcast. I’ll try to post up most of them for you guys!
Writing Prompt: Write about an “Interspeciated workplace.” Or how your character has just received a “Cease and Desist” request from a Web Cartoonist.
Posted in Blogs on August 23rd, 2010 by B.A. Matthews | | 6 Comments »
